The assignment wants to analyze your editing skill, for that reason I can't edit your text, but I'll show you how to edit it.
A fluid text allows for efficient reading with correct pauses. These pauses are expressed by the punctuation that must be added to the text coherently.
It is important to observe the textual structure, which is the way information is presented in the text. A text must have an organized structure with coherent information.
Active and passive voices are related to the positioning of the verb in the sentence. The active voice occurs when the subject is performing the action of the verb. The passive voice occurs when the subject is undergoing the action of the verb.
Learn more about active and passive voices at the link:
https://brainly.com/question/25897080
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