100 points

Buzzzzz . . . Buzzzz . . . Buzzzz. "Mommy, Mommy! Your phone's ringing! Mommy!" Suddenly, Shonda burst out of sleep. The buzzing was coming from her phone. "Hand Mommy the phone, baby," said Shonda as she pushed herself up in bed. The simple act of sitting up was getting harder and harder as the baby in her belly grew bigger and bigger.

In the bold portion of the narrative, the author tries to use a flashback to develop tension. However, the flashback does not create tension. Rewrite the flashback scene so it develops tension right at the beginning of the story.